Warning: This post might insult your intelligence and piss you off. I’d like it to be known here and now that I am not trying to be an arrogant know-it-all on a high horse. If you notice, a lot of my statements have an IF. I’m NOT saying YOU DO THIS. I’m saying IF YOU DO THIS, then you’re probably an idiot, or an asshole, or a redneck… If you find yourself offended by it, then stop being the person who belongs in the IF category. If you stop being that person, then I’m not referring to you anymore, and you are in the clear.
Sorry I’m aggressive. I just am. I can’t help it.
I’m preaching here. My blog is my pulpit. Prepare for the Gospel Truth and a little Real Talk.
This is a message to both Christians and everyone else. It’s a Fuck You with Love.
I’d like to share that I am friends with Christians and atheists alike. At church last Sunday, the minister (who I like, good guy) reminded us to say, “Merry Christmas,” because it’s dying from it’s competition, “Happy Holidays,” and he said it like it’s a war between the two phrases, as if the atheists are killing us with Happy Holidays. <sarcasm>That’s religious persecution at its finest.</sarcasm> Anyway, he told us all to wish each other a Merry Christmas, and everyone turned and proudly claimed Merry Christmas with big smiles on their face, and I was all, “Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays and Happy Bah Humbug Day.” It just struck a chord.
Mind you, I have not had any secular friends get offended by my use of Merry Christmas. I have not seen them share a meme about their beliefs on the subject, but there is a war between the use of Merry Christmas vs Happy Holidays.
Let me recap the war in a nutshell. Both sides just want to piss people off. Period. That’s it. That’s the war.
To the Happy Holiday Fanatics
Someone with a reading comprehension on a Pre-K level can see Merry Christmas to mean “Hey, hope your holiday of Christmas is a Merry one.”
Just because someone is wishing a Merry holiday to people during the time of that holiday and neglecting other holidays from New Years to Valentine’s Day to Flag Day doesn’t make them an ass. I don’t understand where this logic came from, like some of you have really simple minds, but I’ve seen it used frequently. I post, “Wow, Miley Cyrus’s tongue is long!” and people are like, “How dare you post your opinion about something when there’s a war in Syria!” The “Cmon people, there’s more important things to talk about than your topic,” is an arrogant, ignorant remark, and it doesn’t make you appear caring or intelligent because you aren’t being caring or intelligent with that. Not to mention, I can always trump you with your own logic, “How dare you care about a war in Syria when there are children dying from AIDS.” Yep. Check mate bitches.
Oh, I was talking about Christmas. Well to all those, “How dare you wish someone a Merry Christmas when there are other Holidays to include!” ok fine. “How dare you care about those other holidays when there are days off for non-holidays like kids missing school for administrative days, snow days, sick days, vacation leave… So when I say ‘Have a Pleasant Day!,’ I say it because I’m not ignorant of the other days and other religions and human resource policies.” Ha. Checkmate AGAIN! In your face.
To say, “We aren’t ignorant of other religions and non-religious Holidays,” but you neglect Christianity in the same respect, you are being an intolerant ass. If you are saying, “We have to be mindful of Muslim beliefs in respect to religion,” and in the same breath, “Fuck Christians,” you are being a hypocrite. You cannot stomp on one religion in the name of the others and think you are being tolerant and caring with that. You are the same kind of asshole as the Christians who stomp on other religions in the name of their religion.
If a Christian says “Merry Christmas,” because it’s their Christian belief to keep the letters that belong to Christ in their holiday, that’s their belief. What’s so hard about respecting that? I frequently say, “Fuck you” as a greeting to assholes. That is my belief. I have my reasons for choosing Fuck You over Suck my Dick or Kiss my ass or Step on legos. I’m entitled to choose my own words.
We are all entitled to choose our own words.
Fuck you if you think otherwise.
Let me remind you Christmas is based on both Christian and Pagan origins. In fact, let me school you for a minute. What happened was we had a world of pagans who celebrated their pagan holidays. Then Christianity started growing, and people of power was trying to please ALL the people (probably to reduce bitching and whining), so they combined the holidays. Not to mention, some research indicates that early Christians were in awe over Pagans and that’s why they kept some of their traditions. Christians had their thing. Pagans had their thing. Everyone is happy. As time grew, we all started combining ancient myths of lore of all religions and beliefs into the same Holiday, random things here and there in time. You can google each story and find fact versions of it and fiction versions of it (everyone seems to be fighting to claim the origin). Christmas is a clusterfuck of various religious beliefs from pagan to Christian, and nonreligious beliefs. It’s a mut. To say Merry Christmas, one is referring to all religions and non-religion alike.
And just to throw it in there, even though I really see this all as common knowledge, SANTA is Spanish for SAINT, so Santa Claus is a Saint, based on Saint Nicholas. A lot of non-christians celebrate the Christian aspect without realizing it. Funny huh? But Father Christmas (another one Santa is based on–Spanish name Papa Noel (notice no saint)) didn’t give gifts, but he was a feast-eating pro-drinking jolly guy. Of course, our Christmas feast probably comes from the celebration of YULE, where we feast to Odin. My church also has a Christmas tree. That’s a Pagan heritage with a lot of Christian heritage too, so Christians are celebrating Pagan beliefs without realizing it! I can go on and on… Candy Cane — Christian Heritage. Christmas Cookies — Pagan. Christmas Colors (red, green and gold), both Christian and Pagan. Wreaths… pagan. Of course, Christmas Angels, the Nativity and the Star come from Christian descent. There are also things of Christmas that has no religious value whatsoever in the tradition, such as the giving of Christmas Cards.
So to me, it’s just painstakingly obvious that Christmas is a Clusterfuck of traditions from various descents. How. HOW does someone take this history and decide it’s only about Christianity?
Christians, that doesn’t put you in the clear… Oh no. Far from it.
To the Merry Christmas Fanatics
The idea behind Seasons Greetings is to GREET. Not insult other people. The idea behind Happy Holidays is to leave a greeting to people of all faiths and beliefs. That’s why people say it. Not to piss off Christians. To try to embrace all the ideas. You can wish people a Merry Christmas just to wish them a lovely day, it’s ok, but when you get to a point where you are only wishing them a Merry Christmas because you think it’s going to piss them off because they don’t believe in Christmas or Christ in Christmas, ok now you are being an asshole. That’s just not Christ-like.
Christians, I am one of you, and you are setting an example I’m not finding myself proud to claim. I claim it anyway, but please, don’t be a jerk. Christ was about love. Let me remind you, anything you do, if you do it without love, then it’s nothing. You have to have your heart in the right place, and being all defensive about nothing is not the right place.
Christ doesn’t give a shit if people say Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas. He cares less about the words and more about the message.
Here. Share that as a meme.
Greet people this holiday season with LOVE. I don’t care what phrase you use. Just say it with love. A “fuck you” with love is better than a “Merry Christmas” without it.
Now to First Corinthians… (I had to prove to the atheists my point with history, so now I’m proving my point to Christians with the Bible)
13 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing.
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
To ALL THE FANATICS
The issue is we are in a world where the average human intelligence is consumed in emotions, and on a psychological level beyond their conscious abilities. Most of the media hype, from Fox News to CNN to HuffPost to Facebook memes are designed to invoke emotions because that’s the shit that gets ratings and likes and shares and comments. They learned this from advertising. You can argue logic, but you can’t argue feelings. That hype is designed to invoke a feeling, and the best selling feelings are Fear, Anger and Outrage, Shock, and Humor. (see the importance of the oxford comma? list where you link similar items with an and…) Don’t be a sucker to the emotion-fueled nonsense.
Quit spreading rhetoric designed to enrage and strike fear.
I really mean that… I met a woman. She was an older woman that reminded me of my mother, my grandmother, and Fraulein Maria, and she was consumed with fear. She believed the world is going to shit from all the youtube videos and articles she has read stating absurdities about the New World Order, Obama being the anti-christ, Monsanto poisoning the food, vaccinations causing illness… She watched a lot of Fox News. She couldn’t sleep from it. She couldn’t talk about it without quivering in tears. You people scare the shit out of nice people with your bull shit. STOP.
And I’m sorry, trying to enrage people with “They are taking away our religion with Happy Holidays!” or “They are stomping on religions with Merry Christmas,” …
No offense, I love you all, but grow the fuck up. Seriously, you sound like a child. As a mother, I know that sound too well.