Green Crack, Spirit Voices, and Free Shit

Welcome to another installment of Finish the Sentence Friday. Someone concocted (haha, she said cock) a sentence beginner, and a bunch of writers finish it in a post. Check the linky below to get to another post that has a link to all the posts in this legion of awesome writers who probably shouldn’t be allowed to internet unsupervised. This post is going to be a lot of stuff in one.

Finish the Sentence Friday

green beerWhen it comes to Saint Patrick’s Day… I think of the time… Ok, so this bitch named Julie is the girl my best friend’s husband cheated on my friend with once upon a fucked up world time George Bush was president. She’s right up the river from me, and got us famous in yahoo and the internets the year she got busted by police carrying green crack. She dyed her crack green for St. Paddy’s day. So now my inside joke is when I read something whacked, crazy, outrageous, instead of wow, I say, “You’ve been smoking the green crack haven’t you?” And due to Julie’s internet fame, I’d like to let it be known I know the bitch that beat that bitch up.

BTW, my friend’s husband is a great guy now. He just had a rocky path and he’s damn lucky my BFF truly loves him to keep forgiving like she has. Sorry guys I aired it, but it’s like knowing someone who knows someone famous. Honestly, it’s the only thing that comes to mind now when people say, “St. Patrick’s Day.”

I have a Saint Patrick’s Pinterest Board


On St. Paddy’s Day, I’m going through my list of subscribers. Everyone on that list will get an email of a free Irish Dingbat Font I made called Leprechaun Vomit. Images of rainbows, shooting stars, lucky number 7, leprechauns, and other lucky charms. $39 Retail Value.

Just slap your email below. I don’t think you’ll get emailed for every post. Just when I send email, and it’s usually not frequent, and it will probably include random shenanigans. If you want emailed for every post, scroll down, to the right, there’s one that says Subscribe to Blog Feed Via Email.


Brace yourselves for another Blue Lobster Crystal Ponti Production, and I’m going to be in it. Sometime before mother’s day, she’ll be publishing this book of things we learned from our mothers…

Trollop Book Cover


I also have two new YouTube videos of ghosts from my haunted house. You may or may not hear them depending on your hearing, speakers, and what have you. But I have a good entity saying, “You cannot harm her; she is good.” And a female entity saying, “Satan wants your soul.”

You cannot harm her

Satan wants your soul… well it cuts out soul because video editing sucks, so it’s really Satan wants YOUR…


Put the green crack down and read these posts…

Check out Kristi at Finding Ninee

Kelly from Just Typikel and

Lisa from The Meaning of Me

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9 comments for “Green Crack, Spirit Voices, and Free Shit

  1. March 13, 2015 at 2:53 am

    So I have to admit that I didn’t hear any ghosts in the recordings. I wanted to…but it didn’t work out for me. I like that green crack story — hard to believe that someone would go to the effort of dying crack green. It’s a crazy world out there! Hope all is well with you otherwise, and that the homeschooling is getting off to a good start. Happy St. Patrick’s Day!
    The legendary Anna Fitfunner indescribably inscribed…Foods of the Old Country (FTSF)My Profile

  2. March 13, 2015 at 3:16 am

    DAMNIT I didn’t hear the ghosts 🙁
    One night, years ago, my landlord died and both my roommate and I heard her and when we didn’t understand and both asked, “WHAT??” she slammed the door and left. I still wonder about it. And green crack? This is a famous thing? You’re obviously in way more connected circles than I am!!
    The legendary Kristi Campbell indescribably inscribed…Early Intervention Evaluations and the St. Patrick’s Day that Wasn’tMy Profile

  3. March 13, 2015 at 3:43 am

    Hahaha! It was reallllly difficult but I put the green crack down. Congrats on being in the book!
    The legendary Kelly L McKenzie indescribably inscribed…St. Patrick’s Day Irish SconesMy Profile

  4. March 13, 2015 at 3:51 am

    I never did quite understand all the green beer, etc. Clearly, my Irish is not strong enough! But green crack has to be the craziest one I’ve heard!
    Congratulations on the book!
    The legendary Lisa @ The Meaning of Me indescribably inscribed…FTSF – It’s Not Easy Eating GreenMy Profile

  5. March 13, 2015 at 1:01 pm

    I’ve never heard of green crack so I must have been smoking regular crack to miss all of Julie’s internet fame! I liked the good ending to that story that your friend’s husband changed his tune. 🙂 Congrats on the book, and now we’ll be waiting to see you on an episode of Ghost Hunters, too!
    The legendary Katy @ Experienced Bad Mom indescribably inscribed…When It Comes to St. Patrick’s DayMy Profile

  6. March 13, 2015 at 2:16 pm

    Well because I’m chicken even though it is broad daylight, I’m not clicking on the ghosts video. Have you ever seen that one where it’s making you look closely for the ghost and then something big comes on the screen and goes BOO!? Well I’m scarred for life. LOL!

    You really put your friends on blast – had me giggling.
    The legendary Kenya G. Johnson indescribably inscribed…A Terrible Privilege…My Profile

  7. March 14, 2015 at 12:01 am

    Wow. So did your friend beat the crap out of her prior to the green crack debacle. Because it sounds like she did some serious damage to that girl’s brain. Everyone knows that drugs sell better if they are colored blue like Breaking Bad’s meth!

  8. March 14, 2015 at 3:46 am

    Well…how can you resist leprechaun vomit? I look forward to it!
    The legendary Jill indescribably inscribed…Why Our Kids Don’t Celebrate Saint Patrick’s DayMy Profile

  9. March 15, 2015 at 8:37 pm

    The only thing I heard in the videos is what sounded like a toilet running – does that mean I’m on green crack? Congrats on the book!
    The legendary Dana indescribably inscribed…Who is this Pat guy and why are we celebrating?My Profile

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